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Post by FrighTy on Sept 8, 2006 7:56:12 GMT
I.F.: My shit is hard you ready to jump aboard? 1hOttYeVe: oh yhea im so wet right now I.F.: Why you just shower? 1hOttYeVe: no im wet for you I.F.: Did you ever play with supersoakers when you were a kid? or that gator shit you would dive and slide down, there was that badass pool at the end of it. 1hOttYeVe: What the fuck are you talking about? You wanna cyber or not? I.F.: I do! Sorry...I just didnt know why you were wet...then you say your wet for me, and im thinking I didnt even throw water on you... I.F.: Im sorry lets continue! 1hOttYeVe: alright then...I walk over to you and start kissing your neck and chest I.F.: I pop like 16 boners 1hOttYeVe: what the fuck! I.F.: what?
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Post by FrighTy on Sept 8, 2006 7:57:38 GMT
I.F.: You ready yet? Im bearing to go! SexyKarla17: Yhea im slipping out of my clothes right now, what do you look like? I.F.: a Kodiac bear SexyKarla17: ? I.F.: Im soft naked, fuzzy and waiting for you to come mount me SexyKarla17: Oh I love cute fuzzy bears, I walk up and get on top of you stroking your soft hair, kissing you gently as my move my way down your stomach I.F.: I growl to warm you my cubs are near SexyKarla17: huh? I.F.: Bears get fuckin pumped when anyone is near their cubs Sexykarla17: yhea hehe dont be silly.. SexyKarla17: I love how you growl as I continue to kiss you, while taking off your pants. I.F.: Bears dont wear pants and you should cover yourself in Honey now SexyKarla17: hehe you would love to lick that off me huh. I pour honey all over my warm wet body waiting for you to start licking it off me slowly I.F.: I sniff the air to see where the sweet scent of the honey is coming from, while slowly snorting and walking towards you I.F.: I Growl again, and start to bite you SexyKarla17: Yhea that feels good..ooooo...not too hard now I.F.: I bite harder peeling flesh from your stomach, and look up into your eyes to show you my mouth dripping with your warm blood mixed with honey, I then I let my cubs rip apart your limbs and play with you like a ragdoll. SexyKarla17: what the fuck? I.F.:uuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh and im spent.
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Post by FrighTy on Sept 8, 2006 8:16:43 GMT
hotstud69: Hello there blondebabe4u: Hi hotstud69: What is your name? blondebabe4u: Sandy , urs? hotstud69: Bob, nice to meet you.. what are you doing tonight? blondebabe4u: Nothing, just chatting, u? hotstud69: not too much, just sitting around... what are you wearing? blondebabe4u: oh just my thong and a tank top. hotstud69: oh wow, I would love to see that, what do you look like? blondebabe4u: I am 5'6" blonde hair, green eyes, 120 lbs, you? hotstud69: i am 6'0" 175, brown hair, blue eyes, and tan blondebabe4u: you sound very handsome hotstud69: how about I pull that tank top off? blondebabe4u: Oh Bob, i would love for you too.... hotstud69: Oh yea, those look great... they feel nice too blondebabe4u: yes bob, my 36D's like that, you are good hotstud69: oh yes, they feel so good, I am squeezing them.. blondebabe4u: yes bob, you know what you are doing. hotstud69: Oh yea, I am getting so excited blondebabe4u: need me to help you there Bob hotstud69: oh yea, let me unzip for you blondebabe4u: oh wow bob, you have a nice one hotstud69: OH SHIT blondebabe4u: What? hotstud69: SON OF A BITCH!!! blondebabe4u: whats wrong? hotstud69: Got it stuck in the zipper... blondebabe4u: What? hotstud69: oh god, I am bleeding..... blondebabe4u: bob, are you ok? hotstud69: OMG... OMG... blondebabe4u: Bob?? hotstud69: I am feeling faint... blood everywhere... blondebabe4u: are you ok? hotstud69: HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!! blondebabe4u: what bob what?? hotstud69: IT FEEL OFF!!!!!!!!!!! blondebabe4u: fell off? hotstud69: it is on the floor, laying there... I am looking at it, damn, thought it would be bigger......... blondebabe4u: call an abulance... hotstud69: I can't blondebabe4u: why hotstud69: Because I am on the computer blondebabe4u: well get off hotstud69: the last time tried to get off, my dick fell off........ blondebabe4u: bob?? blondebabe4u: bob?? blondebabe4u: bob?? hotstud69: has left the room
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Post by FrighTy on Sept 8, 2006 8:18:07 GMT
Bigbenny02: hi, a/s/l? kwazyfwies: hiya 18/f/usa u? Bigbenny02: wow, 18/m/usa Bigbenny02: want to cyber? kwazyfwies: yes kwazyfwies: you start ok? Bigbenny02: ok then Bigbenny02: I slowly advanced towards you, my breathing quickens kwazyfwies: I'm laying on my bed with just my blouse and nikers on Bigbenny02: I growl like a sexualy frustrated beast! kwazyfwies: lol, I ask you to come closer Bigbenny02: I run across the room and jump on top of you... kwazyfwies: easy big boy Bigbenny02: i turn you over, and rub your back slowly kwazyfwies: mmmm thats nice Bigbenny02: I pin you down and let loose an evil hissing sound kwazyfwies: wtf? Bigbenny02: Surprise! muhahahahahaha, i'm a vampire, and i vant to suck your blood! kwazyfwies: forget it physco Bigbenny02: don't you like it like that babyface? kwazyfwies: no Bigbenny02: i was only joking! sorry, let me try again kwazyfwies: ok Bigbenny02: I gently caress your tender bottem. kwazyfwies: I moan softly Bigbenny02: All of a suden I scream loudly, pull apart your arse cheeks, burry my face in the dingle berry encrusted hair mass, and inhale deeply through my nose kwazyfwies: you sick fuck Bigbenny02: you smell bad baby, do you wash? kwazyfwies: bye looser. Bigbenny02: sorry, its my bad sense of humor, Most people i say it to find it funny? kwazyfwies: ...i don't Bigbenny02: I turn you over, and pull out my purple headed warrior kwazyfwies: its not very big Bigbenny02: you won't be saying that when it infiltrates your poop tube and rips apart your colon!!! Bigbenny02: I thrust my pocket rocket at you, and begin humping your leg like a powerful german shepard! kwazyfwies: don't talk to me ever again Bigbenny02: I move my hands down to your black triangle of love, somehow managing to wade through the jungle of pubic hair, i find a pink patch... Bigbenny02: omg. hidden in the hair is a small penis! kwazyfwies: i'm reporting you... Bigbenny02: I squeel like a freshly wounded pig at the sight of it. Bigbenny02: "so thats your dark secret!" i scream, "you sick twisted bitch!" Bigbenny02: u run away, into the night, crying, the cold wind whipps your naked flesh, i chase after you Bigbenny02: i drop kick you, and rip off your left leg leaving a small bloody stump. "you aint pretty no more!!!" kwazyfwies: blocked. looza Bigbenny02: bye sweet stuff
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Post by Leonard(o) on Sept 8, 2006 16:37:28 GMT
Hahahaha. Where do you find this stuff?!
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Post by rancidpunx on Sept 9, 2006 4:46:43 GMT
evil_sarah: What's up big guy? victimx-9: not much, and u? evil_sarah:Not much. Just sitting here. evil_sarah: What are you doing? victimx-9: lol, i`m doing that too evil_sarah: I bet you're not doing what I'm doing. victimx-9: hehe, now depends what ur doing??? victimx-9: lol evil_sarah: I'm sitting on the toilet. victimx-9: nice smiling pic you have there evil_sarah: Eating a bucket of fried chicken. evil_sarah: Thanks. victimx-9: with a computer on your lap? evil_sarah: yeah. A lap top. victimx-9: novell i suppose evil_sarah: The keyboard is all greasy. victimx-9: i`ll bet victimx-9: so why you doing that? evil_sarah: And there's gravy all over the screen. evil_sarah: I don't know. I like chicken and I had to take a shit. evil_sarah: So... one thing led to another. victimx-9: ok evil_sarah: You at work? victimx-9: no, at home evil_sarah: Me too. evil_sarah: I work at home. evil_sarah: I do this all the time. evil_sarah: Yesterday I took a shit while I ate lunch too. It was nice so I decided to do it again. victimx-9: right evil_sarah: I had fajitas yesterday. evil_sarah: ...and I burnt my thighs. victimx-9: what do you do then? evil_sarah: Have you ever seen those ads that say Work at home? Make $1000 a day? victimx-9: yep evil_sarah: That's what I do. victimx-9: ok evil_sarah: Except without the $1000. evil_sarah: Hang on. I have to dump some of these bones... victimx-9: k evil_sarah: Allright. I'm back. victimx-9: k evil_sarah: Whooo. Man. I'm so full. evil_sarah: This is great. victimx-9: i`ll bet evil_sarah: I'm just eating drumsticks so I can flush the bones. victimx-9: you one crasy bitch evil_sarah: Hey, do you want some advice? victimx-9: ok evil_sarah: Don't ever try to eat chinese food on the toilet. evil_sarah: It's fucking impossible. victimx-9: right, i`l l remember that evil_sarah: GOD DAMMIT! evil_sarah: Hang on. evil_sarah: The toilet is backing up! victimx-9: What happened? evil_sarah: I have too many bones in there! evil_sarah: Son of a BITCH! evil_sarah: It's overflowing allover the motherfucking bathroom! evil_sarah: Hold on! evil_sarah: There's shit and chicken bones and toilet water ................and pieces of corn all over the place. evil_sarah: You there? victimx-9: nasty, best leave you to clean it up evil_sarah: No! wait! evil_sarah: It'll only take me a minute. evil_sarah: Then we'll have cyber sex, ok? victimx-9: oh well that`s a bit forward victimx-9: who says i want cyber?? victimx-9: do you have a nother pic? evil_sarah: Come on. I think we both know that you're attracted to me. victimx-9: how do you get to that conclusion? evil_sarah: Hang on a minute while I wipe my ass. victimx-9:: k evil_sarah: Ok. I'm back. victimx-9: k evil_sarah: Ok. you ready? victimx-9: go for it then evil_sarah: Ok, you start. evil_sarah: I'm kind of shy. victimx-9: no no, please after you evil_sarah: Come on. Don't be such a wimp. evil_sarah: Squeeze my tits. victimx-9: well i don`t know you victimx-9: how big r they? evil_sarah: Wait. Maybe I better spray some air freshner in here. evil_sarah: It kind of stinks. victimx-9: might be a good idea evil_sarah: My tits? They're enormous. evil_sarah: One of them is a lot bigger than the other one though. evil_sarah: Mostly because of the tumors. evil_sarah: Hello? victimx-9: will you change the subject please evil_sarah: Come on. Don't be shy. Spank my ass and pull my hair. victimx-9: what tumors? evil_sarah: Oh, it's nothing. They stopped bleeding already. evil_sarah: Hello? You there? victimx-9: no evil_sarah: What's the matter? victimx-9: not interested evil_sarah: Why not? evil_sarah: You think you're better than me or something? victimx-9: your a bit too crude for me evil_sarah: I'm sorry. I can be nice if you want. victimx-9: oh right evil_sarah: Don't leave me hanging like this. I'm all juiced up and ready to go. victimx-9: lucky you victimx-9: send us a pic then evil_sarah: You got your pants down yet? evil_sarah: Us? How many of you are there. evil_sarah: Ok. I'll send you a more recent one. victimx-9: no evil_sarah: You ready? evil_sarah: Here it comes. victimx-9: just me, and the wife evil_sarah: You're married?! victimx-9: yes evil_sarah: You motherfucker. victimx-9: why evil_sarah: What the fuck do you think you're doing having cyber sex with me then? victimx-9: i`m not evil_sarah: Does your wife know that you try to fuck girls on the internet? evil_sarah: You're a no good lousy cheater. victimx-9: piss off evil_sarah: Hello? evil_sarah: Are you there? evil_sarah: ANSWER ME!!! victimx-9: <<has logged out>>
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Post by suplex2312 on Sept 23, 2006 0:37:04 GMT
omg frighty, i seriously just pissed my pants...im like dead serious.
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Casper
Jobber
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Posts: 73
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Post by Casper on Nov 15, 2006 15:57:01 GMT
Cancer: Want to cyber? John Tenta: OK!
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Post by †SamuraiFoochs† on Nov 15, 2006 16:07:46 GMT
Cancer: Want to cyber? John Tenta: OK! Two in a row tactless death-related jokes. Two in a row PHAILs.
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Post by Gabrielle Montgomery on Nov 17, 2006 4:12:11 GMT
Cancer: Want to cyber? John Tenta: OK! That was cruel...
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Post by Chubbs on Nov 17, 2006 18:40:10 GMT
Cancer: Want to cyber? John Tenta: OK! Again, what is wrong with you?
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Post by FrighTy on Nov 20, 2006 0:07:29 GMT
[glow=red,2,300] Cancer: Want to cyber? John Tenta: OK! I find his complete lack of taste hilarious. The jokes, not so much, but just the fact that both attempts failed miserably... that's funny.[/glow]
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Casper
Jobber
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Posts: 73
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Post by Casper on Nov 30, 2006 19:22:36 GMT
I find his complete lack of taste hilarious. The jokes, not so much, but just the fact that both attempts failed miserably... that's funny.[/glow] ....and yet, you took the time out of your busy schedule to comment and even make it glow. I think Kurt Angle's no-selling 101 could be good bed-time reading. And don't worry, I'll get to work on some Owen Hart vs. Gravity jokes.
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Post by Adzer on Dec 1, 2006 14:45:59 GMT
I find his complete lack of taste hilarious. The jokes, not so much, but just the fact that both attempts failed miserably... that's funny.[/glow] ....and yet, you took the time out of your busy schedule to comment and even make it glow. All of his posts are like that, don't feel special by any means
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Post by President Skroob on Dec 2, 2006 1:29:01 GMT
I find his complete lack of taste hilarious. The jokes, not so much, but just the fact that both attempts failed miserably... that's funny.[/glow] ....and yet, you took the time out of your busy schedule to comment and even make it glow. I don't understand your point. He said he found your lack of taste humorous. If he likes it, it seems like something worth commenting on.
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Casper
Jobber
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Posts: 73
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Post by Casper on Dec 2, 2006 8:51:13 GMT
I can't help being a sociopath.
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Post by FrighTy on Dec 6, 2006 14:39:53 GMT
[glow=red,2,300]Sure you can. Become a hermit.[/glow]
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Casper
Jobber
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Posts: 73
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Post by Casper on Dec 6, 2006 16:08:26 GMT
[glow=red,2,300]Sure you can. Become a hermit.[/glow] Nah, I kinda' enjoy making fun of people less fortunate than I am.
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Post by thedinosaur on Dec 19, 2006 22:28:36 GMT
That is the funniest thing I have read in awhile. All classics.
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Post by Cowards on Dec 19, 2006 22:33:32 GMT
OMG! Straight_Edgu/Trek_Hero/HumanDestroyer!
What's up, DinoMan?
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